Ode to Goose, a cat

January 14, 2023

O Goose! a cat that marks the highest point of water on the shore,
I wasn’t sure, at first, though others were, what to make of you.
That first night, all the lights ablaze, you yowled atop the stair
and wagged your trail so waggishly (we almost named you Dog):
I dreaded your oddness and your wild ways, the way you lapped
water from the shower stall, and meowed your smoker’s growl.
We took our time warming up, Goose, but soon a fondest friend.

But Goose instead, the name we chose, to suit your silly ways.
(“Honey” didn’t catch the edge, the sharpness of your eye or claw.)
You loved your boxes, yarn, and patch before the fire, and took
your seat at the table to join us while we ate. O Goose!
At first, we struggled to trim your claws, you wriggled and writhed,
clawed and bit. You weren’t afraid to whap us as we walked by.
We took it all in stride; we’re a moody family who speaks our mind.

Goose! We gave you many names: Goose and Witty and Woo and
Witty-woo and Sissle and Cat and Goosay Languagay and Goose
Esteban. The vet got your name wrong, Deuce, and we laughed
but were annoyed all the same. You didn’t seem to mind much,
all the names that spun about you every day. You seemed to know,
your name, and though you never came when called, we heralded
your entrance with cries of “Goose!” O Goose, I’ll miss you on the stair.

You left your mark, like your two cat tracks on the stair, one for up,
one for down, on each of us. All our house was a place for you to sleep
or climb or jump. You woke us up each morning, early, with no sense
of weekends or holidays. You’d jump on the bed and rattle the lamp
as you jumped down or rub your cheeks against my stack of books.
O Goose! we knew when you were mad, because you’d scratch.
We knew when you were cozy, from the way you’d curl, legs stuck out.

You loved cardboard, whether it was a box or just a scrap of board.
On summer days, you’d roam, looking for the sunlight glancing in,
to snooze. Then, once warm, you’d find a cooler place to rest.
O Goose, we love you so. How sunlight made your fur glow, your lair
not-so-secret, behind the couch and curtain. I remember, even now,
the feeling the sun burning from your fur, stretching out to cool.
The office chair that was your bed is covered in your fur.

Those times you dragged tangles of yarn all around our house.
That time you stuck a too small box upon your head. Your charm
captured the smile of all who came to visit. O Goose, our cat.
You loved turkey and salmon and fish and loved a food until you didn’t.
When we left, you yowled to let us know that we’d been missed.
And now, you’re missed, it’s all our turn to yowl and think of you.
We called you “best cat” and I know it to be true, O Goose.

Only four short years, how long it seems ago, when we brought you home.
Too short four years, to hear your padding on the stair, to hear your purr
and scratch your chin, to feel you fall asleep between my feet, O Goose.
Farewell, my friend, old cat, my mind will ever turn to thoughts of you,
with fond feeling and a smile as the sadness comes upon me then.
We’ll miss you, Goose, and all you brought to share your time with us.
Goose, best cat, friend: we remember you fondly and with love.

Books that stuck with me from 2022

Some books I liked that I read in 2022:

Shady Characters: the Secret Life of Punctuation, Symbols & Other Typographical Marks by Keith Houston: A book that’s tailor-made for my interests. Still, Keith Houston took a topic that might’ve been quite dull and turned it into something lively, interesting, and chockablock full of fascinating historical tidbits.

The Master of Go by Yasunari Kawabata: Reads like a novel, but it’s the recounting of the last Go match of Honinbo Shūsai. No understanding of the game of Go needed. A window into a different time and place. Deeply thought-provoking.

Termination Shock by Neal Stephenson: A rollicking ride from start to finish. I know Neal Stephenson’s not for everyone (he can really go a bit overboard with the technical detail and digressions) but I enjoyed it quite a bit. Stayed up way too late reading it a couple of nights.

By Night in Chile by Roberto Bolaño: The story of a Catholic priest’s collaboration and deliberate ignorance of the violent excesses of Pinochet’s coup and government. Extremely well-written (or well-translated, I should say).

The Guns of August by Barbara Tuchman: A detailed and astonishing recounting of the lead up to WW1 and its first month. If you like history, Tuchman is at the top of her game here. (I also heartily recommend her history of Europe’s 14th century: A Distant Mirror.)

Days of Rage: America’s Radical Underground, the FBI, and the Forgotten Age of Revolutionary Violence by Bryan Burrough: For me, this extremely even-handed history of 1960s and 70s USA helped to demystify a period of time that I have long felt pretty ignorant of. 

The Blacktongue Thief by Christopher Buehlman: The protagonist reminds me a bit of the thief character in Ladyhawke. Clever and fun, this book is fun romp through an original fantasy world. A perfect travel read.

The Devil and the Dark Water by Stuart Turon: A 17th century whodunnit on a ship at sea! This one kept me guessing the whole time. If you like whodunnits, definitely check this one out.

The Rings of Saturn by WG Sebald: A nameless character walks around the English countryside and ruminates on things that he sees and his own life. Deeply satisfying. There’s some amazing writing here.

Bleak House by Charles Dickens: This is so good. Like swimming in an ocean of words. I did not expect a detective of kindness. (For another detective of kindness, see Benoit Blanc in Knives Out and the Glass Onion.) Not my favorite Dickens novel, but I really really liked it.

Aspects by John M. Ford: An unfinished novel by an exceptional writer. There’s some interpersonal nuance captured in this book that I don’t often see.

Babel: or the Necessity of Violence: an Arcane History of the Oxford Translators’ Revolution by RF Kuang: Basically, if the Harry Potter books were written by someone exceptionally well-read and interested in exploring the way that something like magic would reshape and contort a country and the world and the people in it.

Thoughts on a metaverse

Increasingly, I think when people are thinking of the metaverse or a mertaverse, they’re fixating on the wrong thing. There’s this funny notion that we need to recreate three dimensional space in a shared virtual online world.

In a sense, the metaverse is already here. It’s just a jumble of mobile apps, web sites, email, text messages, and anything else you can think of. I think that we don’t think of this as “the metaverse” because it’s what we’re used to. It doesn’t have the whizbang quality that we imagine from a science fictional universe. On rereading William Gibson’s Neuromancer trilogy recently, what struck me is how little people are wowed by any of the technology in it. It’s almost dull and blasé. It’s easy not to notice the water when we’re fish swimming in it.

The cyberpunk idea of the metaverse is trapped in the idea of mainframe computing. The idea that computers would be small enough that you would just carry them around in your pocket wasn’t something that occurred to those science fiction writers from the 80s. Even the 1999 movie The Matrix is trapped by this idea of thin terminals connecting to a centralized computing hub. What are Twitter and Facebook and all these other social media sites, but expressions of this same basic idea.

But our experience of our collective internet (which I think we need a better name for than metaverse… perhaps, noosphere?) is one of portable handheld devices and notifications and lots and lots of text. The podcaster Blindboy described Twitter as a massively multiplayer online roleplaying game (MMORPG) and I think that’s exactly right. We’re all playing in a metaverse already, whether we’re on one of the big social media sites or not.

Back in the early days of the internet, this would be the early 90s, I got my hands on internet access and joined my friends on a text-based roleplaying (not game) server called LambdaMOO. I don’t think I’ve ever experienced anything quite as thrilling as hanging out with my friends in this weird textual universe. The amazing thing about it was that I could change what I looked like, what my house looked like, how different things behaved, simply by typing words. I was pretty much only limited by my imagination and the time I was willing to put into typing out words.

As a compulsive reader, I understand the power of words to throw a person into another place. Through the power of my brain, I can enter into a virtual reality whenever I pick up a book. As I’ve been noodling around with various AI art and text generators lately, I think there’s an obvious opportunity here to create a text-based multiverse using (at the very least) AI text generators plus whatever creative juice lots of human beings can summon up.

Like a wizard, I imagine casting some spells to summon some AI creation to raise a tower from the ground. Then I can invite all of my friends to hang out there. Like a MySpace page, I can make it as cool or as janky as I like. Why not throw a music player in there? I feel like there’s a real opportunity to make something lo-fi and compelling that inspires the kind of creative noodling that’s available to anyone who can type some words on a keyboard.

In Xanadu did Kubla Khan

A stately pleasure-dome decree:

Where Alph, the sacred river, ran

Through caverns measureless to man

Down to a sunless sea.

So twice five miles of fertile ground

With walls and towers were girdled round;

And there were gardens bright with sinuous rills,

Where blossomed many an incense-bearing tree;

And here were forests ancient as the hills,

Enfolding sunny spots of greenery.

“Kubla Khan”, Samuel Taylor Coleridge

I’m pretty sure there’s nothing in a painfully hidebound 3D virtual reality space that’s going to conjure up as vivid a picture or as much emotional resonance as part of this poem from Coleridge, for example. I think we’ve been underestimating the great power of language. And it’s been hiding under our noses this whole time.

I’m not technically savvy enough to even know how to begin making some kind of textual metaverse (I say textual, but there’s no reason it couldn’t have images and video and a whole mess of other things, too), but it seems like an idea worth throwing into the void.

Booooooooooks!

It’s funny how much I think of myself as not actually reading that much (I do a lot of other stuff, too) but when I sit down to write them all down, it starts to seem like a pretty large number.

Night Heron by Adam Brookes: A solid spy/thriller set in China. Tense and exciting. I wasn’t sure where this one was going to end up. I’m always a little skeptical of books about China written by Westerners, so definitely take this one with a grain of salt.

The Midnight Library by Matt Haig: I almost certainly read this one because it had the word "library" in the title. I’m wracking my brain trying to remember a thing about it. (I read a synopsis about it.) Oh yeah, I quite liked this story about a woman living different lives, in a multiverse kind of way. Clearly inspired by Borges’ "Library of Babel" story. I don’t know why it didn’t stick with me, even though I enjoyed reading it.

Termination Shock by Neal Stephenson: My biggest problem with Stephenson’s books is that I lose too much sleep to them. I enjoyed this one more than any of his books since the Baroque Cycle. I’m sure that Stephenson’s info dump style of writing isn’t for everyone, but of you’ve enjoyed any of his other books, you’re almost certain to enjoy this one too.

The Dragon’s Path (Dagger and Coin, book 1) by Daniel Abraham: I set out to read the first of The Expanse series, but instead I somehow ended up reading this fantasy story instead. It’s got that epic fantasy flavor, but it’s more about trade and diplomacy than war and fighting monsters. I liked the sedate vibe of this book. Characters who are good at what they do or discovering what they’re good at, struggling to succeed against pretty steep odds.

By Night in Chile by Roberto Bolaño: Read this for a book club. This is a solid intro to Bolaño, because it isn’t many hundreds of pages long. The story of a Catholic priest’s slide into corruption leading up to Pinochet’s coup and after. Dark, dark stuff. Not a pleasant read, but a pretty eye-opening one.

Desperate Characters by Paula Fox: Another one that I have pretty hazy memories of… Ah, yes. An unhappy married couple have an unpleasant weekend together. The cat (who bites the wife) is the most vibrant character in this book. It’s not quite an anti-marriage novel, but I can’t imagine someone wanting to rush off and get married after reading it. Pretty mesmerizing stuff, even though it whooshed out of my head pretty quick after finishing it.

The Return of the Soldier by Rebecca West: West’s book Black Lamb and Grey Falcon is one of my favorite books, so I was delighted and surprised when this short book turned up in my free library box. An emotionally fraught book about a solider returning from war and having no memory of his wife. Very odd.

The Guns of August by Barbara W. Tuchman: The story of the first month of WWI. Powerful stuff about how (probably?) smart and capable people can think themselves into catastrophe when given enough power and opportunity. Things that stood out: I had forgotten (or never knew) just how close Germany came to winning the whole thing in the first month; the English were completely hapless and almost entirely useless in the first month of the war; people were terrified of Russia’s army, but when they got into combat they proved to be a paper tiger.

Drown by Junot Diaz: A collection of short stories. Once I looked up the titles of the stories, I remembered them. "Edison, New Jersey" and "Negocios" were the ones that stood out for me.

Foundation by Isaac Asimov: I read this when I was a kid and, after watching the recent tv series, I was curious to reread it. I had forgotten how much it feels like a set of short stories. I think it holds up pretty well though. The adaptation has a very different vibe. The book has an almost jovial quality to it that the adaptation is completely lacking. It was fun to reread it.